There is just one simple truth,
Do not discount or limit God’s Grace, Do not let your doubts and fears rule over your Faith.
In moments of weakness, we are made strong, in moments of sorrow we are comforted, in moments of uncertainty we are blessed with courage, in moments of sickness we are shown mercy, in moments of troubles, trials and tribulations we are shaped and molded so that we can find our purpose.
A seed of an apple knows it’s an apple seed, it does not ask the soil or the farmer, what kind of seed it is, but when it comes to us, when it comes to people in general our purpose dwells within us but it is only in moments of struggle, that we truly grasp what we are capable of achieving, it is our trials and hardships that shape us and prepare us for our purpose and it is our Faith in God that guide’s our path to Salvation, Liberation and Victory.
August 14th 2021 started off like any other day for me and family, my dad woke up at 6am, my brother was just finishing up his work from home shift and my mom had just woken up and had her cup of tea and was readying herself to listen to the Morning Mass on EWTN and I was still asleep.
I was shaken awake when my brother said Josh get up, something is wrong with Daddy, so I did, my dad had just come out of the toilet and was sitting on the chair and asked my brother to take him to his room and said give me some sugar, so we thought that maybe his blood pressure was low, he had the Sugar and rested on his bed, a few minutes passed, I made myself a cup of tea and sat by the window as my dad laid on the bed besides me, I asked him “Daddy, how are you feeling?” he said he was ok, so I looked outside the window, it was raining and I love the rain, a few minutes later I asked again “Dad how are you?” he said “I’m Ok” so I let him rest as I was looking outside the window, random thoughts kept floating around in my mind, a year ago I had a dream about my dad and in that dream a date was given 17th but I did not recall the month or the year or what the date meant for my dad and every month on the 17th I paid close attention to my dad, but today was the 14th of August so I was a little worried but I wasn’t too worried but all that changed in the blink of an eye.
Suddenly my dad’s left hand reached towards me, I caught it and I looked at his face, his eyes began to roll back, I rushed to his side, I said “Daddy what’s wrong” he said he couldn’t breath. I called my brother and my mom as my dad was getting worse, I asked my brother to call the local doctor but the doctor wasn’t Answering his phone, my dad was tossing around on the bed, I didn’t know what to do, the doctor came on the phone but he said “I’m out of town” so I called my neighbour on the ground floor and told her what had happened, I asked her if she had the number for an ambulance but she didn’t, I asked her if I could borrow someone’s car from the building but she said that the person who had a car was not well so I should call an uber, so we did.
As I looked at my dad I could see him fighting, I told my mother, go get the holy water and proceeded to lift my dad and hugged him, I said “Relax Papa, don’t worry the car is coming” and I saw his eyes close and I knew what that meant, so I kissed him, I told him I loved him.
That was the first time I cried in 15 years, I took the holy water and put some of it on my father’s head, I anointed his forehead, my brother sat behind my dad and was rubbing his back and saying “daddy relax, the car is coming” my dad said “Joshua please forgive me I love You” I said “There’s nothing to forgive, I love you dada” he said the same words to my brother and also told my brother “Take care of my Joshua” he said “Take care of your Mother” to the both of us. I kissed him on his forehead and felt his body was getting cold, I began saying the “Our Father” my brother and my mom joined me, suddenly my dad started kicking his legs all over the place, I laid him down and placed my hand on his chest, and we were still praying, my father was calling for his elder brother, who passed away 20 years ago, he was in pain so I said “Daddy let go, I love you and don’t worry we will be okay” those were the hardest words to say but I could see his pain and then I remember saying "God said Have Faith" I screamed it as I cried because I thought my dad was leaving me but then just as it started it ended, my dad was calm, he looked at me and I asked my brother, where’s the Uber.
My ground floor neighbour rang the door bell, she came in and said Uncle, what happened, my dad said “I can’t breath properly” and just then the Uber came, we put on our shirts and my dad put his hands around my brother’s shoulder and proceeded towards the door, I collected his medical files and we got into the car and rushed to the hospital, which was an hour away, all the way to the hospital my dad was calm, he was responsive, he was breathing even with his mask on. We reached the hospital and as we laid my dad on the hospital bed it happened again, the eye roll, the arm twisting, the head moving towards the side. The doctors immediately, placed my dad on a Ventilator and rushed him to the 1st floor.
My father had a heart condition, he had 3 blocks 80% 90% and 100% we found that out in January of 2020 but never really had the help needed nor the funds to afford the procedure, he had a wound on his leg and doctors kept giving him medicine but it had no effect, for over a year I did the dressing for my dad’s foot and every time I did it I said “Papa God is healing your foot and you see he will heal your heart too, he will open your blocks and my mom always said Amen”
But here we were
my dad, my brother and me, at the hospital, by God’s Grace my dad’s heart doctor
was at the hospital too, they did a 2D echo and checked his breathing, the
doctor said he’s critical his heart rate was 20-30 beats per minute, he needs a permanent pacemaker but we had no money for that
kind of procedure, so the doctor said then take him to a government hospital if you cannot afford it or we can put a temporary one and so
we did, I remember the nurse talking to me just before they put in the temporary pacemaker, she gave me some paperwork to sign and said sir please be aware that we will do our best but it's not in our hands your father is critical, I said to her madam I won't blame you if anything happens but as a son I must do what I can to save my dad, I have done what I could and you do what you can the rest is in God's hands. After the procedure My dad was then put in the ICU, for now he was stable.
In May my brother
told me that his company had asked him to make a years payment if he wanted to
keep his medical insurance, and that was too high, so we opted out, but in June the
company began cutting the money for the insurance, and although it was hard we
went along with it, “God sees things you aren’t able to imagine and prepares
the road ahead.” And so here in August we tell the doctor sir we will put in
the permanent pacemaker on Monday, let us speak to our insurance company, the
doctor said do what you need to, the temporary pacemaker can sustain him for 72
hours, and then we were called by the “PRO”he said "Insurance or no Insurance
you need to make a deposit" so we asked him for sometime, he tried to make us sign some papers we refused and gave him a small deposit, he accepted it, the money for the temporary pacemaker and the small deposit was from a few days before
that, we had taken a loan (roughly converted from my currency into US Dollar) $1000 because we were asked to shift from our rental home
after 4 years, we lost our permanent home years ago and this place was home but
when they ask you to move you have to.
The loan money, was used for the temporary pacemaker, it was used to put down a hospital deposit, it was used to buy the meds for the first day, and the insurance company was silent. I told my brother that I would stay for the night, and that night did not go stress free, then Sunday morning came and I sat outside the hospital and I cried, I asked God for help, the money which we needed for shifting was nearly over, my dad needed a permanent pacemaker and still no word from the insurance company, our monthly payments were due, and a few people I asked said “Sorry, Unfortunately we don’t make contributions like that.” but then I knew there were people on Instagram (you know who you are) praying for me and my family but I was sad that evening because I heard one of the attendants say to the PRO (public relations officer) "Keep the patient comfortable, they have no money, only if they can make the payment which was (roughly converted from my currency into US Dollar) $5000 or if the insurance comes through only then do the procedure." That was my dad this lady was talking about to the PRO and what she did not know was that she was on loud speaker and I was standing with the PRO in his office listening to her. I never cried so much before but at 7am the next morning there I was crying to My God and on a rainy cold Monday and a few hours later, the insurance company called they said they would pay for the Pacemaker, the medicine, the doctor fees and the stay, the money that we paid for the medicines was returned back to us, but we would have to keep a nonrefundable deposit with the hospital but the procedure can be done immediately.
The day was Tuesday, I walked into the hospital and the nurse said your dad wants to see you, I went in the ICU, my dads hands were tied, he was still on the ventilator and they tied his hands so that he did not pull out the tubes going down his mouth or nose, but he made a sign with his hands, it was the sign of the cross. He was asking me to anoint him and pray for him so I did, they took him in, an hour passed then two, suddenly the lights went off in the hospital I was afraid, the nurse came out and a patient in the waiting room asked the nurse where is the doctor, she replied "The patient is critical, doctor has asked everyone to come after lunch" I looked at her so did my brother I guess she did not know that the patient she spoke of was our father.
(I wrote the above and this paragraph as I was in the hospital) As I write this a day has passed I am at the Hospital it's 5pm Wednesday it’s raining, My dad’s in the ICU but this time, He’s not on a Ventilator, he’s breathing on his own, he has a pacemaker and the doctor says he is making great progress. He’s eating solid food, and that wound on his leg well the doctor removed the scab and found that wound was healed a long time ago but the scab had not fallen out, the icing on the cake is that my dad’s heart doctor called us upstairs and said the artery that was 80% is now 60% the artery that was 90% blocked is now 70% the blocks opened and the 100% blocked artery well it did it’s own bypass and is supplying blood to my dad’s heart. The blocks Opened, the doctor said the medicine worked but my brother and I knew that it was God who did the Impossible.
It was God who made a way, It was God who made the insurance company suddenly start cutting the money from our account so that we would have enough to do the procedure and the best part is the operation was done on the 17th of August and cut to today on the 10th of October I am happy to say that my dad is sitting in the living room laughing and smiling, with a bandage on just below his shoulder.
A family friend, and two friends from Instagram helped us with their generosity and we were able to shift our residence just in time as my dad came home, as I look back a lot of things hurt me, the attendant for one, but what she said wasn't a lie "We had no money" my previous landlord who never once called or said keep the place till December let your dad recover but isn't God amazing.
I still have some medical bills to pay and 2 overdue monthly payments but "I'M GRATEFUL" my dad is here. Everyday at the hospital I remember telling myself how useless I am, a writer who makes no money, a author who sold two copies of his book. I remember saying to myself how unworthy and worthless of a son I am but That was the devil attacking me through my thoughts but all I know is that when I was vulnerable with God, He seen my tears, my pain and made a way for my family. We weren't always poor, we lost our home, our car our business. There are people who have great wealth and yet they die, because at the end of the day it is GOD who decides. Only yesterday my dad said to me son "I was at deaths door but I know I wasn't alone Jesus was there, God The Father was there, Mother Mary was there, The Holy Spirit was there as I fell into darkness. I heard you say Daddy let go, for a moment I was blind, I couldn't see you but I heard you and I know you said what you said because you didn't want me to struggle. But Jesus brought me back, I wasn't ready to go, I was fighting and Jesus saw me struggling and sent me back, He pulled me back."
All I can say is that God makes a way. For the last month things haven't been easy, helping my dad to walk, he was unable to eat because of the damage to his throat caused by the tubes but today he can.
Today something within me said that sharing this message is far more important.
"Do not deny God His Glory."
God has done a lot for each and everyone of us, but sometimes we get so caught up in our lives that we forget to Give GOD His Glory.
If God has saved you, a loved one or a person you know from a situation or sickness in your life you should share it, I would love to know about it and post it to my blog, if you wish to be anonymous please mention it in your email to me, but do not deny God His Glory.
You can email me at followjsd@gmail.com or leave a comment below. There is no shame in spreading what God has done for us.
If you should feel so inclined to help me you can support me on Patreon, your help will be greatly appreciated.
https://www.patreon.com/iam_jsd
Kind Regards, your brother in Christ J.S.D
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